Wobble

Well, I had my first proper leaving wobble tonight.

Been an amazing couple of days. The Holy Jah Dove's gig at One Love was utterly fantastic. Beyond words. Kassim's last gig. Him and Lies fly to Belgium on Tuesday. Both he and she shed a few tears, and all of the band were there. They played three hours straight and, when it came to their hit Maguru, they stretched out the dance for a full ten minutes! How they didn't pass out with exhaustion, I have no idea. But my gods, what an amazing send-off.

Here are some pics from the gig at BCK (thanks Paula):

Kayaga fronting.

Patrick playing.

Kassim (right).

L-R: Paula, Steve (playing his last gig) and Sonya.

And from the actual last One Love gig! (Thanks Lies):

Me and Lies after hours of dancing.

Lies & Kassim in the centre of a band photo shoot
with Holy Jah Doves.

I danced my heart out. My hair turned into a waterfall (was really hot inside). Just an awesome night. Got home around 4am and fell into bed. 

Last night I was tired and only intended to go out for a short while. It was a house party over at Lies and Kassim's place in Kiyovu. The food was out of this world: fried fish, soma, goat, rice salad, ibirhy - huge spread. Had a lovely time and such big hugs at the end. Can't believe they're leaving. Lies has been here six years!

Ended up swinging past Giudi and Maxime's place in Kisimenti on the way home as it was another house party for Maxime's birthday. Loads of people, and I arrived just in time to sing Happy Birthday.

I made the mistake of joining the waragi train, and Cathryn and I ended up stumbling out in the early hours. I got home around 5am and proceeded to get a full eight hours' sleep.

I'm absolutely gutted I'll miss their wedding. Like Giudi says: 'we're family.' But they're giving a repeat performance in Canada next year so if I can get a job by then I'll go.

Family pics:

Me and Giudi at SoleLuna.

L-R: Anja, Cathryn, Me & Giudi at J's house.

L-R: Me, Pierre, Giudi & Jo at Jo & Pierre's pizza party.

 

Today, D came over and I introduced him to baked beans on toast and Dexter. 

D hiding behind his hat.

We watched a couple of episodes, then walked down the road for beer and food. He took me to the place that makes the amazing fried pork and I stuffed myself silly.

But that's where I had the wobble. I just thought about missing the wedding and all the Single Parent Network stuff that's taking off, that I wont' be here to see.

I ended up crying on him. Was the first proper leaving wobble I've had. Went for coffee with Cathryn at Chez Lando yesterday and was hit by a wave of nostalgia and 'holy crap - two weeks!', but tonight was the first real 'noooooo!' moment. Going back to no house, no job, and no network of local friends after I've had such purpose here, so many extremely close friends, my neighbourhood and my man.

It's an awful concept, and it all hit me at once.

D surprised me. He's got absolutely no interest in visiting the UK, we'd talked about it before, but he suddenly said he'd be willing to work towards it - save up, take a look at the paperwork for a visit.

I think I'm going to try and hook up with our friend from Eyecon when I get back. Someone who knows D, who knows me. Who will understand what I'm feeling. There'll be Jo and Pierre too, and all my other friends who are back. Think I'm really going to need them. This is my home now, and, like when the UK was my home, it'll be hard to leave. But I'll do it, and I'll manage. Nothing is an absolute end, just a transition.

Can't believe it'll be my leaving do next weekend. I hope time drags its feet.

Lies summed it all up in a word though: Turikumwe. We are together.